Woodlife Trails

Mrs P can’t quite get Bushcraft terminology right. She does try her best, bless her. She says things like, “Are you going trekking today,” (instead of tracking); “Don’t forget your school-bag,” (Rucksack) and “That bloke Ray Bushmears is on TV.”

She also refers to “Fire-thingy” (firesteel); “Grubs” (animals with more than 4 legs); “Quilt” (sleeping bag) and “Smelly object” (me.) She also can’t quite understand why I keep asking her to try on, rucksacks, ponchos and other olive green paraphernalia. She does accept all this with good cheer though.

So I thought I would prepare a little A-Z of Bushcraft terminology aimed specifically at Bushcraft partners who perhaps don’t quite understand what it’s all about. Over the next few months, I’ll occasionally add a few terms that the Bushcraft partner can cut out and keep for reference.

A is for Axe:

A Bushcrafters “must have”. The object is to spend weeks pondering which axe to buy, and then buy the most expensive one (which the Bushcrafter was going to buy in the first place). When they receive it, they will coo over it, stroke it (and possibly take it to bed.) They will get the blade as sharp as possible, shave their arm, use it in the back garden to chop a few pieces of wood and then quickly run inside to re-sharpen it.

They will spend more money on accessories. This will keep their axe company so that it won’t get bored. This might include an axe file, circular whet-stone or diamond hone (for starters). They may buy a new blade cover or even a smaller version of the same axe for the same amount of money. This will please their new found friend no end. You might find that they start looking at trees in a different way, possibly grinning and looking very much like Jack Nicholson in “The Shining”. Don’t let this bother you too much. Beware when they start drooling at the mouth.

They may break down in tears when they notice a minor dink in the blade. It does happen and there are support groups to help them through this (refer them in the first instance to BCUK.) Please be patient and caring. A cure is to allow them to spend a good few hours trying to get the dink out. Do not allow them to take the axe to the pub.

B is for Bushcraft:

Despite what you’ve heard, Bushcraft is an affliction. It is a disease that grips the unsuspecting person when they are at their lowest ebb. It usually starts with watching certain outdoors television programmes and particularly affects the age group of 30 – 45 who haven’t considered buying a high-powered motorcycle.